What happened to the human race? A rant on Feminism, betas and dating. A nice guy gone nasty. via /r/lonely

Yeah this post will crucify me. I don't care anymore. My thoughts on dating over the years have went from excited, to cautiously hopeful, to reluctant, to depressed, to self improvement, to discouraged and now, with dating I am just outright ANGRY.

Look I'm 30 years old, I know when a person, including myself, starts using terms like "society" and "everyone" and "in today's day and age" it usually means that something is wrong or not working for them and they are trying to blame every and anyone else. I agree with that statement, I agree there are things I could do or change to make things easier on me, but I have come to the point where I'm okay with how I am, and I'm not changing anything else to make myself work better in the system. I'll either find someone else that likes how I am, or i'll die lonely, because I am done with trying to play nice with society, the reward is not worth it.

When did Feminism stop meaning things like equal pay, fair treatment and respect for women and start becoming a thinly veiled excuse for women to to hate men, or simply allow them to prejudge us based on the actions of a few. You want to be a CEO and be treated fairly, I'm all for that and I have your back, but I'm sick of feminists turning relationships into competitions. I've yet to meet a girl who strongly relates herself as a feminist that was worth getting to know as a person, let alone date. It's come to the point where if a girl tells me she is a feminist I'll stop talking to her rather than deal with the accusations, double standards, entitlement and bad attitude. Feminism has this special status where you can't have any other opinion of it because you are either whole heatedly agree, or you are a sexiest pig who hates women.

My biggest problem is the fact that what women say they want is the exact opposite of the things they actually seem to go for. I have gone my life treating women as equal, because I believe that they are, I have been respectful, supportive, understanding. I have kept my sexual advances in check and treated women like people, not property or sexual objects. I have been accepting and understanding when they talk about their problems and insecurities and share mine as well, looking to build a complementary relationship built on mutual respect and not sexual tension. do you know what my prize is? the friend zone! and you know there the double standard comes in? after you do all these things, treat women the way they say they want to be treated, and they place you in the friend zone… the man becomes the villain when he tries to express his desire for a romantic relationship or suggests that he has needs too that are not being met. The guy is now this sleazy asshole that was only your friend because he wanted to date you. Oh how terrible for you… I forgot that men are not allowed to want anything! You ask us to treat you like equals and friends, you complain about the unwanted sexual advances, so when I make a genuine effort to get to know you as a person and become your friend, like you all insist you wanted, i'm a terrible person when I reveal my "ulterior motives" of wanting to date you, which is interesting because it was never really a secret I was interested in you, and in fact I think the women simply liked the attention, as long as it remains interest and appreciation that is nonthreatening while I restrain myself from making all of those unwanted sexual advances you talk about. So when I stop talking to you because I respect the fact you say you are not interested I am the bad guy for deserting you. The fact I stopped talking to you because you made it clear my wishes, needs and wants would not be met is such a terrible thing now! I forgot men were put on this earth to fulfill all of your needs while not getting theirs met in return.

The friend zone is a one way relationship where the women gets her needs met without having to do much in return. I admit I am at fault for allowing it, but don't call me selfish or deceptive or a bad person when I respectfully make my own wishes known, and withdraw, because that's another thing you say you want, men to respect your wishes. I didn't know respecting your wishes of not wanting to date actually means I have to fulfill all of your wishes by boosting your ego, treating you like a princess, doing all the things you want and indefinably ignoring all of my own wishes and desires.

What's so bad about wanting a girl to be a bit submissive and needy anyway? How did we make it such a terrible thing for a guy to want to take care of a women? I know you can do whatever you fucking well please, but what happened to women who want to be taken care of a little? Women who like being a bit submissive? I know that type of woman used to exist. I'm sick of being made into some terrible sexist pig because I would actually like to find a woman that enjoys staying home and is happy to great me at the end of the day with a hot meal. They don't have to do it, but I know there were women once who enjoyed doing it. We made the stay at home wife into some terrible oppression devised to benefit men. If YOU don't want to do that, cool, no problem, do whatever you want… Feminism was supposed to be something that gave you choices and rights. You can choose not to. I am NOT a bad person for wanting a submissive wife. If I tried to force it on you, then yes I would be, but I am not a bad person for wanting that, saying I want it, passing on girls who don't want that, and seeking girls that do. I shouldn't be judged for wanting a relationship dynamic like that. If people are happy with it, want it, are not pressured and forced but choose that, then there is nothing wrong with it. Making men that want an "old fashioned" wife into something "wrong" is almost like making same sex marriage wrong, simply because it does not fit into your personal view of what a relationship should look like.

Honestly, I didn't start this angry. It's a lifetime of frustration and disappointment and trying to "do it right" that made me this way. It's made me stop seeing women as these complex beings that men can't understand to simply viewing them how they are, and deciding that the vast majority are not worth wasting my breath on.

When a woman can tell me what she wants, and then actually wants it, then i'll date her, but that's like asking to live forever or like trying to get an answer for the meaning of life. You want to call me an asshole, I don't even give a shit anymore. I am what I am, obviously the women in my life up to this point didn't care for it. Instead of saying "sucks to be me" I'm just going to say "sucks to be them" now, because I'm the one that dodged a bullet and they are the ones that missed out.

I would rather be unhappy and lonely then deal with typical women anymore. Maybe one will pop up and surprise me, but the majority are a waste of energy.

Let the down voting commence.